Waiting for a Miracle
by MarieLightning
Summary: What happens when things don't turn out the way we expected them to? As Tonks get pregnant with Remus' child, she find out that no matter how we plan our lifes, it'll always be changed by little miracles.
1. Prologue

I once heard that the only thing we can be sure of in life is death, but I think it's a bit depressing. I prefer to think it's not true. From the minute I was born, all the things I believed be sure of in life was love, friendship, happiness and fun, as much as enemies, hate, sorrows and disasters.

The thing I knew for sure too was that I would probably get married and have children. I did say probably, because even though I wanted it, I needed to find the guy who would agree on both those things, which is not as easy as it might seems, especially when the man you love is stubborn. And when I say stubborn, I mean really stubborn. Like… too much for his own good. Something probably affected him in his childhood. Other than being transformed into a werewolf, obviously.

I do think that from the very first moment of our birth, the way people act around us, talk around us, will have a consequence on our life. How much time it took before our mother held us, things like that. Events in our early childhood too can change our life. Perhaps the fact that my childhood was a very happy and tender one influenced the fact that I wanted children.

And surely the fact that Remus' life had been hard influenced the fact that he didn't want any.

Apart from his kindness, sorrow is the first thing I saw in Remus' eyes when I met him. I remember how confused – and sad – I felt. To me, life was full of light and happiness and amusement. And here came a man that didn't seem believe in those thing. To him, every day was a war against himself. Against who he was, who he wanted to be and who he believed to be.

In fact, I remember seeing pain on every single one of his feature, and it wasn't hard to guess that his soul was no exception to the rest of his body. And as soon as I saw how broken that man was, I wanted to hold him close, to make him laugh and smile, to make the sadness go away. But being as stubborn as he was, like I mentioned earlier, it was not an easy task. His shell was closed to friendship, not to speak of love. But he wasn't the only hard headed person in the world, and I never gave up.

Of course, that brought me lot of pain too, but who ever said love was easy? I won at the end too, even though it took me a lot of time, strength and tears, but after two whole years of hope, he was mine. And I had never been as happy as I was when he was beside me. When he kissed me and held me close. Of course, like every normal couples, we had our little problems, especially on full moon time, when he became picky and grumpy. But it didn't really bother me, it mostly annoyed him. He didn't like the fact that he was being like that with me, as if he was afraid it would scare me away.

But in fact, the real trouble began after three years of going out together. And he's the one who got scared away.


	2. First Month

The sun had just risen, but it was already shining bright in the sky. It had actually been a very hot August month, and rare were those who didn't feel the weight of this uncommon heat wave. Tonks felt it very much. Only wearing underwear, she was lying in bed, still sleeping, breathing softly. Suddenly, as the sun was heating her pale face, she opened her big twinkling eyes and gazed into the sky. The clouds were as white as white could be, the sky such a deep blue that it seemed unreal.

With a small smile, Tonks sat on bed and stretched up, yawning. She grabbed the summer dress that she had thrown on the floor the night before, and smiled again when she remembered why the dress had been so uncaringly thrown away. She got up and walked to the kitchen, almost dancing, where she poured herself a glass of cold milk. Then, she felt a small soft kiss, more like lips touching lightly her skin, at the bottom of her neck. Tonks turned around and smiled.

"Good morning sunshine," said Remus.

Tonks sighed and passed her arms around him. She put her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes.

"I can't believe I'm going back to work today," she said.

"Well, life goes on you know."

"But it has been such a perfect summer break!" she sighed. "And now, we're going back to reality…"

"Reality isn't that bad, Dora," laughed Remus.

"Since when do you think that?"

"Since I met you."

He caressed her cheek and kissed her forehead. Then he took her hands in his and looked in her eyes.

"I have something for you," he said.

"What do you mean?"

"A present. For our three years together."

"Remus, you are so sweet… but… we agreed that we would make this summer holiday our gift, I have nothing for you," said Tonks sadly.

"Accept this present and I'll be happy."

He handed her a small box, carefully wrapped in golden paper, decorated with a big pink bow. Slowly, Tonks unwrapped it and opened the small box. Her mouth fell wide open as she took what was in it and she stared at Remus.

"Remus… this is…"

"An engagement ring."

He took the delicate diamond ring from her hand and held it between them.

"Would you agree to wear it for a while?" he asked as he put it on her thin finger.

"Gosh Remus, this… I… you… are you kidding me?"

She threw herself in his arms and hugged him tightly.

"Gosh I love you," she sighed.

"I love you too."

----------------------------

After the excitement and the happiness returns the quiet and dull time. That's how life is made. Normal, peaceful, sometimes lightened a moment of joy or darkened by a touch of pain.

Accordingly, Tonks and Remus went back to work and their daily routine resumed. The last summer month was coming to an end and the heat wave left to make room for a cool autumn wind, at the beginning of the September month.

Remus and Tonks kept their engagement quiet for a while. One day, as they were eating breakfast silently, an old looking owl landed – or more likely fell – on the kitchen table. Tonks laughed as Remus took the poor animal, offering him a piece of toast before handing the letter that was attached to its paw to the young laughing woman in front of him.

"Poor Errol, you must be longing for your peaceful grave," said Tonks as she opened the letter.

"It's a wonder that bird is still alive," agreed Remus, looking at Tonks. "What is it?"

"Monthly dinner invitation, of course," grinned Tonks.

"Already?"

"It would seem that Arthur is taking Molly on a holiday at the end of September, so she decided to organize the dinner half way through the month."

"And when is it?"

"Friday night. And I think that would be the perfect time, you know…"

"Time for what?" asked Remus absently.

"To tell them."

Remus lifted his eyes from the exhausted owl and considered Tonks for a while. Then he smiled.

"If you think you are ready for Molly, Ginny and Hermione's excitement," he said teasingly.

"You forgot about Fred and George's jokes, but yes, I am ready Remus."

"Then we will tell them," he said, reaching for her hand and squeezing it.

----------------------------

That Friday night, Tonks and Remus apparated together to the Burrow. Knowing that the house would probably be empty on such a beautiful day, they went around the house and arrived in the enormous garden.

Arthur Weasley was sitting near the house, talking to his son Charlie, who himself was holding a small sleeping red headed boy. A pretty young woman was standing beside him, playing with her husband's hair.

On the other side of the backyard, Molly was setting the table, helped by Hermione and Fleur, while the rest of the Weasley family, including Harry, were playing Quidditch, except Percy who was probably locked in his bedroom.

As soon as she saw Remus and Tonks, Molly rushed to them with a large smile and hugged them motherly.

"Hello my dears, I'm so glad you came."

"Molly, you know we would never miss any of your invitations," said Remus.

"Besides, none of us can resist your cooking," teased Tonks.

"Now, you both…" began Molly.

"Marguerite, reviens ici à l'instant!" shrieked Fleur, interrupting Molly.

Tonks turned around to see a beautiful blonde little girl running around the backyard, stopping at the sound of her mother's cry and coming back to her. Fleur grabbed her daughter's hand and looked at her angrily.

"Ne t'avais-je pas dis de rester près de moi, jeune fille?" 

"Si maman," sighed the small girl. 

"Alors reste ici."

The three years old child sat on a chair with a sulking face and then noticed Remus and Tonks.

"Auntie Tonks! Uncle Remus!" she said happily, jumping in their arms.

"Wotcher sweetheart," said Tonks, hugging her.

Remus only patted the girl's head uncomfortably, squeezed Tonks' hand, walked toward Arthur and Charlie and sat beside them. Tonks followed him with her eyes and sighed. She knew he wasn't comfortable around children and, to a certain extent, she could understand him. After all, he had refused himself a love life for over twenty years, and Tonks sincerely doubted her would ever agree to have kids of his own. But maybe someday…

"Tonks, come back to us," laughed Hermione. "You're hundreds of miles away."

Tonks smiled to her friend and deposited the dishes on the table. The dinner went very well, except for the time Fred (or was it George?) turned Ron's spoon into a small snake. Then, when everyone was sipping a cup of tea, coffee or milk, Tonks glanced at Remus, who was looking quite nervous. Then he smiled at her and got up. Everybody else stopped talking and looked up at him. Feeling how nervous he was, Tonks got up too and took his hand in hers.

"I… er… we would like to say something," began Remus, his body shaking slightly.

He stopped and looked around the table. Everybody's eyes were filled with curiosity, except Molly's, which were filled with tenderness and excitement, as if she already knew. "That's not surprising," thought Remus. "That woman knows everything."

"Nymphadora and I are engaged," he finally let out.

After that, all became a blur to Remus. Hermione and Ginny shrieking, Molly crying, the twins cheering, Harry winking, Tonks laughing and all the others smiling. It lasted for about half an hour, and then Tonks disappeared in the kitchen with all the other women as Remus staid outside with the men.

"Cheer up, Remus," laughed Harry. "You look so pale."

"I'm just trying to catch my breath now that I'm not being hugged to death," said Remus with a smile.

Later that night, Tonks and Remus apparated back to their apartment. They were both exhausted, but happy. Something new was waiting for them. They couldn't know what it was yet… would they be happier? Tonks knew they would, and as she falling asleep in Remus' arms, she could feel all the love and happiness the future would give them.


	3. Second Month

Tonks was feeling so, so sick. What was happening to her? She hardly ever had a cold! And there she was, in the bathroom, coughing and gasping for breath, regurgitating all she had eaten that day.

Finally, she got back on her feet and looked in the mirror over the sink. She didn't like the image it sent back to her, but it had been like that for two weeks now. Her cheeks were even paler than usual and her lips were white. Her eyes, usually so big and twinkling, were small and tired, lacking the stars and laughter that often brightened them. As for her hair… it wasn't pink anymore, it was a weird dirty blonde.

Tonks sighed and turned the tap with her weak and trembling fingers. She formed a cup with her own hands under the clear and cold water and briskly threw it all in her face. The water rolled down her cheeks, giving the impression that she was crying, but Tonks was feeling a bit better. Closing the tap, she took a fluffy towel and dried her face by pressing it gently against her face. She looked in the mirror again and stared at her reflection. Her eyes were still tired, though a bit bigger, and her hair was still blonde, but her cheeks had more colour, thanks to the cold water.

With a small sigh, she got out of the bathroom, walked to the living room and sat on the couch. She quickly looked at the clock on the wall and sighed again. It was only two pm, Remus wouldn't come back from work before five, or maybe even six. As for her, the ministry had given her a week off, insisting on the fact that they were worried about her health, but, in reality, only tired of having to clean up after her every day.

Tonks lay on the sofa and grabbed the small blanket that was lying on the floor. Covering herself with it, she shivered and looked outside the window. The wind was blowing madly… she couldn't see it, but she could hear it. It sounded like an old woman wailing… crying… dying. Tonks shuddered. She usually loved the wind, she found it so jolly and happy! But this wind was anything but friendly. It was sad, so sad, as if it was remembering all the sorrows of its past. Tonks suddenly got up and walked to her bedroom where she quickly put on a shirt and a pair of jeans. If she had to feel sick, she wouldn't feel sad, depressed and scared on top of it.

She grabbed her wand and her coat and got out of the apartment. She rushed down the stairs and stepped outside the building. Where would she go? Everybody was working, even Molly and Arthur were away on a small trip. Tonks decided to go to Diagon Alley. She hadn't bought anything in a while and that would surely make her feel better.

She was walking in London, looking for the Leaky Cauldron, when something else caught her attention. She looked at the shop's name and smiled before slowly pushing the door open. She stepped inside as if she had stepped in another world. Everything around her made her feel calm and happy, she was not sick anymore. She walked toward a small shelf and took a tiny dress in her hands. All around her, women of any age were doing the same thing. Young girls with starry eyes, expecting for the first time. Older women, pregnant with their second or third child, and even nice elderly women, buying small gifts for their grandchildren.

Tonks looked around again and noticed a small wooden cradle, all covered with pale pink cloths and purple and white cushions. Tonks went to it and caressed it softly with a sad smile. She didn't know why she even bothered; Remus would never agree to have children. She sighed when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Can I help you Miss?" asked a friendly voice.

Tonks turned around to see a smiling young woman with rosy cheeks and brown curly hair. Tonks smiled back and looked at the cradle again.

"No thank you, I'm just looking," answered Tonks.

"When is he due?" asked the girl, still smiling.

"What?" said a confused Tonks.

"The baby, when is he due?"

"Oh!" said Tonks before smiling. "I'm not…"

Then she stopped, horrified. She felt as if she had just fallen in icy cold water… as if someone had just slapped her in the face.

"Are you okay?" asked the brown haired girl worriedly.

"Yes…I have to go!" she said in a hurry.

She rushed out of the shop and ran in the busy streets of London. She wasn't even looking where she was going and how she got home was even a mystery to her. She ran upstairs, opened the apartment door, rushed in the bathroom and looked in the mirror again.

Her face was all red and wet with sweat, she was shaking and trying to catch her breath… her throat was burning, her legs were aching. Her eyes were wide with fear and her mouth was open, her lips trembling. She knew now why she felt so sick, why she was so tired, why she cried so often.

"I'm pregnant," she whispered, her white lips barely moving.

----------------------------

Tonks was sitting in the dark, staring at the naked wall. Her lips were dry, as were her eyes. She had had time enough to cry lately. Now she couldn't cry anymore, she had to do something.

Two weeks had passed since she had found out she was pregnant. Of course, she had rushed to St. Mungos to have an examination, but it wasn't needed. She knew she was pregnant, she didn't needed any healer to tell her so. In nine months, she would have a child. And then, what would Remus say!

That night, when Remus had come back from work, she had intended to tell him, she had. But as soon as she had opened her mouth to talk, she had closed it again. He seemed so happy! How could she even tell him that he was going to be a dad? If it was a miracle for some people, it would have been a disaster for Remus.

And so, he didn't know the truth yet. Tonks sighed and pulled her legs close to her body. She felt so lonely! Remus had been away for ten days now, for work. And Tonks had been in pain ever since.

"Tonks?" said someone behind her.

Tonks looked behind and smiled sadly at the young red haired woman.

"Wotcher Ginny," she said, trying to sound cheerful, only managing to sound fake.

Ginny looked at her worriedly and came to sit right beside her, putting her arms around her friend's shoulders. Tonks felt tears coming to her eyes but she blinked furiously to chase them away.

"How are you sweetie?" asked Ginny. "You don't seem well lately… you're so pale."

"I'm always pale," said Tonks with a small smile.

"Not that way," said Ginny sternly. "You are ill Tonks. You need to take care of yourself."

"I do take care of myself, Ginny!" cried Tonks

"It doesn't look like it, and I won't stand it anymore. You're coming with me," she said, getting back on her feet and forcing Tonks to do so too.

"Where do you want me to go?" said Tonks, sitting back on the couch.

"We're going to St. Mungos," answered Ginny, dragging Tonks back on her feet again. "And now!"

"Ginny, I'm not going!" 

"Yes you are," said Ginny, taking Tonks' arm and bringing her to the door.

Tonks pulled her arm away from Ginny's grip, turned around and took her face in her hand, her shoulders shaking. Ginny sighed and put her hand on Tonks' arm.

"Tonks… please, go there with me. Let me help you," she said softly.

Tonks turned around and looked at Ginny desperately.

"I already went there, Ginny! I know what I have and I'm not sick… I'm pregnant."

Tonks started to sob loudly and Ginny looked at her, confused. A baby! She was having a baby! But… why was she crying? Wasn't it good news? Ginny went closer to Tonks, took her hand and looked in her teary eyes.

"Tonks… isn't it a good thing?" she asked shyly.

"It won't be for Remus," sobbed Tonks.

"Oh…"

Suddenly feeling uncomfortable, Ginny looked at her feet and sighed. Tonks continued to cry for while and finally calmed down. Ginny looked up again and tried to smile.

"How long… when did you find out?" she asked timidly.

"I've known for two weeks now," sighed Tonks.

"And you haven't told anybody yet?"

"No… you're the first to find out."

"So Remus…" began Ginny.

"Doesn't know yet," interrupted Tonks, looked scared. "And you mustn't tell him!"

"You don't have to worry about that Tonks."

"You mustn't tell anybody! Nor Harry, your mother, Ron or Hermione, not anybody!"

Ginny smiled sadly and hugged Tonks tightly. Having been raised in a large family, she knew what it felt like to want children, and she couldn't imagine how she would react if Harry told her he didn't want any kids.

Or how afraid she would be if, by accident, she got pregnant…


	4. Third Month

Remus was finally back from his work trip and Tonks was not as sick as she had been in the two first months of her pregnancy, but she still had frequent headaches and colour had not yet come back to her cheeks – nor sparkles to her eyes. But that could simply be accordingly to the fact that she hadn't told Remus yet.

She knew he was worried about her. Every morning, he'd ask her if she felt any better, if her head still ached. Every morning, she'd answer that she was feeling well and that her headache was almost gone.

Sometimes, she would escape stressful evenings or days by going for a drink – without alcohol, of course – with Ginny. She was still the only one who knew, though Tonks felt that Molly's eyes could go into her mind and read her soul. The time she spent with the young red haired woman did make Tonks feel loads better. With her, she could talk freely about the baby – about her pain, her fright, her expectations… and her excitement. She was indeed excited. Every day, she loved the baby more and more… and it scared her, it even terrified her. And her growing fear kept her from telling the truth.

And so life goes on. Tonks kept her secret to herself and Remus finally stopped asking questions when she convinced him that it really was nothing but a cold and that she would be grateful if he didn't ask any more questions since her head ached so much.

The month of October quickly gave way to November. The month of death. Not that it was such a scary month… mostly a sad one. Everything was falling asleep… the trees, the plants, even the sky was always grey and dull.

On the tenth of November, Tonks woke up to see big fluffy snowflakes falling from the sky. For a moment, she forgot all about her worries. She softly kissed the still sleeping Remus on the cheek and got up, feeling alive. She went to the bathroom, took a long shower and came back to her bedroom. She grabbed one of her favourite pair or jeans and put them on… or tried to anyway.

For about ten minutes, she struggled with those darned trousers, but she had to accept it… her trousers didn't fit her anymore. She threw the pair of jeans away and grabbed all the others trousers and skirts she owned before locking herself in the bathroom. She tried them all, one after one. After half an hour, ten discarded trousers and three that she still managed to put on – with help, obviously – she fell on the floor and started to cry. Oh, how she hated to cry these days… she was so mad at herself too! A pregnancy was supposed to be something happy and cheerful, and all she had done during the last weeks was crying.

Another week went by, during which Tonks had to resolve herself to buy new clothes. One day, she was sitting alone in the living room, eating ice cream, when her eyes fell on the calendar that was hanging on the wall. She sighed. Mid-November. She had now been pregnant for three months, and Remus still didn't know anything about it. And it seemed to Tonks that, the way things were going, he would never know because she would never be able to tell him.

The night before, Tonks had innocently started talking about babies and children, and Remus had said nothing except: "I wish it was possible for me to have some." Tonks had quickly dropped the subject and she had fallen asleep that night with silent tears rolling down her cheeks, her hands caressing her growing belly.

Tonks sighed again. It seemed to her that it was all she was doing since she had found out for the baby. Sighing and crying. Slowly, she got up and walked to the kitchen, where Remus was reading the newspaper. She sat down in front of him and cleared her throat, making him look up and smile at her.

"Remus… honey… I have to tell you something. I've been keeping it from you for too long now…"

Remus' face fell and he glanced at her worriedly. He had been thinking for a while now that it was too good to be true… she would now tell him that she had found a younger man, who was not a werewolf, and that she didn't want anything to do with him anymore.

"Two months ago… remember, I was feeling very sick… and I didn't understand why. One day, I went shopping… when you were away on your work thing. And I don't know why, something made me go in a baby clothes shop."

Remus groaned. He wasn't in the mood for the baby confrontation again. He knew she wanted children and he did wish he could have some, but it was impossible! Why wouldn't she understand that?

"When I was in there… a woman asked me when was the baby due," Tonks said with a small dry laugh. "I answered that I wasn't pregnant, that I was just looking."

Tears came to her eyes again and she looked at her pale and trembling hands. Would she even be able to do this? With a shaking and teary voice, she started talking again.

"At that point, I stopped talking Remus. I felt as if I had been punched in the stomach. And I knew why I was so sick. I understood it then, Remus."

Remus was looking even more frightened. He was shaking his head, he didn't want to hear this. He wanted her to stop, he wanted to wake up from this bad dream.

"Remus do you hear what I'm saying? I'm pregnant!"

She had shouted the last sentence, but Remus didn't even blink. He only stared at her, which only added to Tonks' fright and anger. She had been sick for two months, and so afraid! And now he only stared at her, stared through her, as if he wasn't seeing her, as if she was part of the furniture.

"Say something!" she heard herself cry.

Remus jumped and finally looked at her, really looked at her. But Tonks didn't like what she saw in his eyes. She put her hands on her stomach, feeling alarmed and scared.

"How long have you known?" he asked calmly. Too calmly.

"I found out two months ago…"

"Two months!"

"But the healer said I'd been pregnant for one month then… so the baby would be three months old now."

"Why didn't you tell me before?" he asked, looking sad.

"Because I was scared…" whispered Tonks.

"Scared? Of what?"

"I don't know Remus! I've been scared and sick and sad and angry! But I don't know why!"

She broke into tears and took her head in her hands. Remus got up, went to her and took her in his arms, hugging her tightly while she cried on his shoulder.

"It's okay sweetie," said Remus softly in his ear. "We'll be okay. We'll go to St. Mungos tomorrow and see what can be done."

Tonks backed up and looked in his eyes, as what he had said entered her mind. Putting her hands on her belly again, she looked at him doubtfully.

"What do you mean we'll see what can be done?" she asked, her eyes full of fright.

"Well… to get rid of it."

Tonks opened her mouth and closed it again. She knew he wouldn't be happy about it, but never had she thought he'd be so cruel and insensitive…

"You want me… to get an abortion? Is that what you're saying?" she asked coldly.

"Tonks, I know it's hard but you know we can't have a baby," said Remus softly.

"Why not?"

"Tonks, are you crazy or what? Werewolves don't have children."

"Well there's one right here who will."

They stared at each other for a while, Remus in shock and Tonks filled with anger. This was her baby, their baby! She wouldn't kill him, she wasn't going to destroy an innocent life because of Remus.

"Tonks… you can't have this baby," he said slowly.

"I'm not going to kill my baby because you are freaking afraid of yourself, Remus Lupin!"

"Then you'll have to manage this thing alone because I won't take care of it."

Remus grabbed his coat and angrily stormed out of the kitchen without even looking at Tonks.

"That's it, run away! That's the only thing you're good at anyway!" she shouted.

She heard the door of the apartment slam and she fell on her knees, crying. She patted her stomach gently and sighed through her tears.

"It's okay baby, you're okay. I'm not going to kill you. I'm going to have you, to love you, to cuddle you. And it'll all be all right. Nothing else matters."

But that night, as Tonks was falling asleep in her bed, all alone, she was still crying and she had never felt so alone in all her life.


	5. Fourth Month

The next morning, as soon as Tonks woke up, she felt that something was wrong. First of all, Remus wasn't beside her, but that she could understand. She looked around the room and felt that there were things missing. Second point; Remus' suitcase, which had been right beside the door the previous night, was no longer there. Tonks got up hurriedly and opened the wardrobe. Finally, all of Remus' clothes were gone, as were his shoes. Sighing, she closed the wardrobe door and returned to her bed. Then, she noticed a small piece of paper on her bedside table. She reached for it and slowly opened it. As she read it, her face grew harder and her eyes filled with anger, until the last sentence which brought tears to her eyes.

"Dear Nymphadora," said the letter.

"I know you want to keep this baby and, to a certain extend, I understand why, though I don't know why you decided to keep it in the first place, knowing my opinion on the matter and therefore inflicting yourself the pain you are feeling right now.

However, you know it is not too late… I am not trying to hurt you on purpose Dora, but you know perfectly well that werewolves having children is a stupid and dangerous idea. It is very hard for me to say this, but I am afraid that if you decide to keep the child, we will have to put an end to our relationship, for the baby's safety. It is your choice Dora, and I won't try to influence it.

I think that right now, we both need to keep our distance with each other. We both have some thinking to do. I would be grateful if you told me about your decision as soon as possible, no matter what you choose to do.

Know this Dora. Whatever choice you make, I will always love you.

Your own,

Remus"

Tonks slowly folded the letter as tears streamed down her face. And so she really was left alone… He would not change his mind about the baby… but she wouldn't either! Wiping her tears away, Tonks got back on her feet and put some clothes on. They were things to be done and planned. But before she could do anything, she would tell her friends about it. Now that Remus knew, nothing kept her from telling them.

Ten minutes later, she was knocking at the Burrow's door. Molly opened the door and pulled her inside with a big smile and a motherly hug. Tonks was grateful that Molly was acting so motherly toward her since, in a way, she was the only mother she had left. Her own mother had died two years ago, during the war… but the good thing was that she had taken her sister, Bellatrix, with her.

After hugging almost all of the Weasley (those who were there anyway), Tonks went to the living room, requesting everybody's presence. She could see that Ginny knew what she was going to say, and Molly's eyes were shining with excitement. They all sat down, but Tonks couldn't. She couldn't even move anymore, she wasn't sure how she would manage to speak. However, she took a long breath and looked at Ginny, who gave her the thumbs up.

"I have some news…" she began.

"Are you getting engaged again?" asked Fred teasingly.

Molly shot him an evil glance and Ginny smacked him behind the head. Tonks laughed a little and then smiled sadly.

"No, Fred, we are not getting engaged again. Actually… but I won't get on that subject," she said painfully. "No, this is something that will probably be more… surprising…"

Instinctively, Tonks put her hand on her belly, which was getting bigger and bigger everyday and she tried to figure out what to say when Molly gave out a little shriek. She had sprung up on her feet and was now looking at Tonks with big eyes.

"Nymphadora Tonks," she said, causing Tonks to wince. "Are you pregnant?"

Tonks sighed and then laughed, before looking at Molly.

"Molly, I don't know how you do it, but you always know everything… and keep us from announcing our own good or bad news ourselves," she said with a false reproaching look.

But in a way, she was glad Molly had guessed what she was about to say. It had saved her from having to say it herself… which she was not sure she'd have been able to do, even with Ginny's encouraging face.

Soon, she found herself being hugged by everybody in the room. In a way, it made her feel very sick. Remus should have been with her. They should have told about her pregnancy together, smiling, laughing, happy. But she was all alone… she had been afraid of telling them all about it… and she wasn't exactly happy either. As everybody was congratulating her, she was trying not to burst into tears. She was smiling at everybody, but only her lips wore the fake smile, it didn't reach her eyes. Molly, as usual, noticed. Soon, she made everybody go back to what they had been doing and dragged Tonks into the kitchen with her.

"Tonks, darling," she said softly. "Are you feeling well?"

"It's… it's just…" began Tonks, but soon the tears came back to her eyes. Her voice broke and she fell in Molly's arms, who patted her head while whispering in her ear.

"It'll be okay Tonks, you don't need to be afraid," she said.

"I'm… not… afraid," managed Tonks through her tears.

"What is it then?" asked Molly confusingly.

"Remus…" whispered Tonks.

"Oh…"

Molly hugged Tonks very tightly while the young woman was sobbing on her shoulder.

"What is it? He doesn't want the baby?" she asked with a comforting voice.

"He… he says that… it'll be too… too dangerous," sobbed Tonks.

"And where is he?" asked Molly, thinking that a certain werewolf was no better than dead.

"I don't know!" cried Tonks. "He's gone… he said… he said that he's respect my choice, whatever it was… but he wouldn't take care of the baby."

"Tonks!" shrieked Molly. "Do you mean to say that he left you alone during your pregnancy?"

Tonks sadly nodded and tried to calm down a little. She wiped her tears away and sighed before looking up at Molly.

"It's okay Molly," she said, trying to sound happy again. "I'll be alright, I just needed… to tell you all. But it'll be okay."

"Tonks, there is no way I'm going to let you be alone while you are pregnant. If Remus doesn't go back to you, then you are moving in here," said Molly with a very strict look.

"Molly… I can't…" began Tonks.

"Nonsense!" said Molly, interrupting her. "You are not staying alone in that apartment of yours. You'll come and live here until the baby is born, and after that, we'll arrange something else."

Tonks stared at her feet. Something in her wanted to accept the proposition very badly, but she simply couldn't take advantage of Molly's generous nature because she was feeling lonely.

"Tonks, this is not a choice or a proposition I'm giving you," said Molly as if she was reading her mind. "It's an order. You are moving in tomorrow, and I don't want any complains or arguments."

Molly looked at the stunned Tonks, got back on her feet and grabbed a bright red kettle. She filled it with water and faced Tonks again.

"Now, I'm going to make you a cup of tea, and then Fred and George will go with you to your apartment. You'll have the whole afternoon to pack up your things," she added as she was now taking out two cups and teabags. "You'll have a good night of sleep and tomorrow morning, I'll come and pick you up myself, and you'll come back here with me. Understood?"

Tonks looked up from her feet and stared at Molly. Slowly, she got up and walked to Molly. She hugged her very tightly, tears coming back to her eyes, but this time they were happiness tears. And she was smiling.

"Thank you Molly. You really are a mother to me."


	6. Fifth Month

And so life goes on, or so they say, and brings changes as time passes. Tonks, who had always been an only child, found herself surrounded by a huge and loving family, which she did consider as her own. Her stomach was getting larger everyday, making everybody at The Burrow smile, as she had always been so small.

November ended as quickly as it had begun, making place for the white world of December, which arrived with its big and fluffy snowflakes, bringing music and joy in the air. Everybody could feel it, Christmas was coming. But surprisingly, Tonks wasn't looking forward to it. She didn't know how she could go through it without Remus, which was weird since she had spent many wonderful Christmas days before meeting him. But everything was so different now…

On Christmas morning, Tonks woke up in her bed, as usual, but she didn't want to get up. She buried her head under her pillow and mumbled to herself as she heard Molly knocking on the door.

"Tonks dear?" She said softly from behind the door. "It's time for you to get up."

Tonks pressed her pillow on her head even more before sighing and sitting up in bed.

"Er… Molly, I don't feel that good actually," she said, "I think I'd prefer staying in bed for now."

Tonks lay back down on the bed and stared at the ceiling. She closed her eyes and then heard a soft noise coming from the door. She sighed and looked to see who it was, though she already knew. Molly came closer and sat on the bed. She smiled softly and took Tonks' hand.

"Tonks, I know that you are feeling a bit off lately, and I completely understand. It's hard for you. But now it's time to have fun and forget everything, even your problems. Leave them at the door as you push it open, dear. Now come downstairs, everybody is waiting for you." She said before hugging Tonks.

Tonks nodded and got dressed silently before slowly going down the stairs. She would have preferred to stay in bed, but she didn't want to disappoint Molly.

She entered the kitchen which was filled with laughter and happiness, and almost instantly, Tonks felt her old self coming back . She ate, drank, laughed and sang with everybody else, before being dragged into the living room.

In the middle of the room was a huge Christmas tree. Harry, Ginny, Hermione and Ron had spent the whole of the previous day trying to make it look like a normal – well… at least as normal as possible for a wizarding family – Christmas tree, but after they had finished their job, the twins had passed by, and it was now filled with magical tricks and jokes. And so, if you got too near one end of the tree, you'd turn green, and if you touched this or that ornament, the only thing that would come out of your mouth for the next few hours would be Christmas songs.

And of course, under the tree, loads and loads of gifts could be found. Big ones, small ones, huge ones and tiny ones… Everybody started opening their presents, but Tonks only looked at hers… or rather stared at them. She didn't know why, but she couldn't open them.

"Tonks, what are you waiting for?" asked Ron as he was putting on his maroon jumper. "Come on, open your presents!"

Tonks smiled at Ron and sighed before kneeling down in front of the tree and grabbing her first present. She carefully opened it to find a beautiful hand-knitted blanket.

"Molly, this is gorgeous," she whispered, her eyes sparkling as she looked up at the red haired woman.

"I'm glad you like it dear," answered Molly, squeezing Tonks' hand.

At the end of the day, Tonks really was in the mood of the season. She had received lots of baby clothes from most of the family, including Harry and Hermione, a few toys from the twins, and even a small cradle made by Arthur.

When she went to bed that night, she was almost completely happy. She wrapped her quilt around her body and yawned before closing her eyes, her heavy head resting on the pillow… when she heard a small noise coming from the window. An annoying noise. She sighed, sat on her bed and grabbed her wand.

"Lumos," she whispered.

Light came out of the tip of her wand and she saw what was outside the window. A big owl was flying in circles, waiting to be able to come in. Tonks jumped onto her feet and opened the window, letting the owl fly in. After dropping a small package on the bed, it flew out and disappeared in the night.

Tonks went back to her bed and took the small box in her hand. She turned it up and down, searching for a name, but didn't find any. Suspicious, she put the box back on the bed and got up again, but then she stopped as she felt something under her foot. She looked on the floor to see a small letter that must have fallen out of the package when the owl had dropped it.

Tonks grabbed the letter and sat on her bed before opening it.

"Dear Nymphadora…"

Tonks' heart started beating faster as she read further.

"You will find that this small present is not much, but I still wanted to wish you a very merry Christmas. I hope you will like it.

Sincerely yours,

Remus."

Tonks put the letter back in its envelope and started unwrapping the small box. She opened it carefully and, as tears came to her eyes, she took the big book and caressed the golden writing on it. Baby's Pictures. A photo album… As tears were freely rolling on her cheeks, she opened it and her mouth fell wide open.

On the first page, there was a picture of her… she knew that picture, it had been taken by Molly when she had moved in with the Weasley, but the fact that this photo was in the album meant that Molly had known everything about the present. Under the picture was written: Mummy, four months pregnant.

Tonks smiled softly and then sighed as she wiped her tears away. She had been afraid of facing Christmas… well, not alone, but… without Remus. And even though she had realized that her life without him would be full of small obstacles and long painful days… she would live through it. For her baby.


	7. Sixth Month

Tonks was trying to make her way through the streets of London, but they were incredibly busy for such a cold winters day, making it hard for the pregnant girl that she was. She had to hurry though, she was already late for her appointment at St. Mungo's, and she simply couldn't miss it.

She had now been pregnant for six months and two weeks. February had just begun, bringing a bitterly cold temperature with it. The wind was blowing hard, and the ground was covered with ice, making most movement impossible to achieve.

Finally, Tonks reached St. Mungo's, half an hour late, but she knew that the healer would still examine her. St. Mungo's didn't usually give appointments for things as simple as pregnancy, but the fact that the father was a werewolf, and also probably the fact that Hermione was working there as a healer, had helped Tonks to get a few examinations at the wizarding hospital.

"Tonks!"

Tonks turned around to see Hermione waving at her from the other end of the room. She ran to her and hugged her.

"Wotcher Hermione," said Tonks, smiling widely. "How are you?"

"I'm fine," answered Hermione. Then she took Tonks' hand and dragged her in the elevator. "You, Miss, are late for your appointment."

"I know," groaned Tonks, "I'm sorry, but there were so many people in the street today, plus the ice everywhere, and I'm six months pregnant too, you can't expect me to move easily."

Hermione laughed and shook her head.

"If you have trouble moving when you are six months pregnant, I can't wait to see you during the ninth month."

"That's if I ever reach it," mumbled Tonks, "I tell you, I'll be insane before I even give birth. Every time I'm walking in the street, wherever I'm going, old ladies stop in front of me and start talking to me as if they know me, and then they pat my stomach and talk to the baby as if he can understand them."

"Babies can hear sometimes, you know," smiled Hermione.

"Oh, I'm sure they can," said Tonks. "But do you really think they understand things like: woozie woozaaa. Seriously, they are making me sick, and besides, it's not normal!"

"The worst thing is… it is normal, Tonks," laughed Hermione. "For most people anyway. And you'll get used to strangers stopping you in the streets."

"And what if I don't?"

"Well in this case, stay at home. Now, come with me, we'll go see how this little angel is doing," said Hermione as she pushed Tonks toward the closest door.

Half an hour later, Tonks was waiting outside for the results of her examination, a worried look on her face. Usually, the Healers told her right away if the baby was healthy and all those things… and now she had to wait for "results"?

The door flung open and Hermione rushed out of the room with a wide smile on her face. She hugged Tonks tightly and laughed excitedly.

"What, what, what!?" said Tonks. "Hermione, what the h-…"

Hermione stopped hugging Tonks and put her hand on her friend's mouth.

"Language, Tonks!" shrieked Hermione.

Tonks took Hermione's hand and pushed it away.

"Hermione, are you crazy or what?" she asked.

"Yes, I am, and, oh Tonks, it's wonderful!"

"What is?!"

"You are pregnant with…"

"Hermione, I know that I am pregnant, come on!"

"A beautiful daughter…"

"I'm having a baby girl?" asked Tonks excitedly.

"And a darling son."

Tonks' smile disappeared and she stared at Hermione. Her mouth fell wide open as she pointed her belly, trying to speak, but no word would go through her lips.

"Tonks?" asked Hermione worriedly. "Tonks, are you alright?"

"I… you mean… am I… I'm having twins?" she finally said.

"Yes you are!" said Hermione happily. Then, seeing Tonks' expression, she stopped smiling and took her friend's hand. "Is there something wrong?"

"No… nothing wrong, it's just… wow… I… I'm surprised…" she managed to say.

Tonks fell on the chair behind her and took her head in her hands. Hermione sat beside her and hugged her.

"Tonks, talk to me, what's the matter?" she said sadly.

Tonks looked up at Hermione, tears rolling on her cheeks.

"Hermione, I can't do this alone," she said. "I can't manage it all by myself, I won't have enough money, I won't have enough time! I won't be able to do this on my own… I'd need two heads and four hands," she sighed.

"Come on Tonks, we'll be there to help you," said Hermione. "I'll be there, Molly will be there, Ginny too, even the boys."

"It's not the same, Hermione…" said Tonks with a sad smile. "I mean… I can't stay at the Burrow forever, I know it, you know it."

"Come on," said Hermione as she got back on her feet and helped Tonks to get back on hers. "I'll call Molly, I'll ask her to come and get you. I'm not letting you go home on your own."

Tonks wiped her tears away and smiled at Hermione.

"It's okay, I'll manage," she said.

Tonks squeezed Hermione's hand and made her way toward the door. She pushed it open and took a deep breath as the winds' coldness hit her. She shook her head and, determined, stepped outside. She started to walk, but she didn't know where she was going. She needed to find an Apparition spot so that she could go back to the Burrow, but there she was, walking in the street, looking for no place in particular.

After a few minutes, she stopped in the middle of the street and stared at the little shop in front of her. She knew that shop… she had entered it a few months ago… and she had found out, or most likely realized, her pregnancy in it.

With a look around, Tonks walked to the shop and entered it. The air was warm and everything around her was peaceful and quiet. It was almost empty, since few people were out on such a cold day. Tonks started going around as memories filled her.

The last time she had came into this shop, she was still with Remus… they were both happy, together. She had no idea about the baby and she could still walk in the street without being freaked out by strangers who thought that, simply because she was a pregnant woman, it didn't matter to her if people she didn't know at all touched her stomach and talked to her belly.

Tonks opened her handbag and looked inside. She started to go through her stuff, trying to find some Muggle money. When she finally found some, she counted it and looked around again. Her eyes fell on a pair of cute little baby pyjamas, on which was a tiny and friendly looking wolf. Tonks touched the pyjamas softly and then grabbed it.

A few minutes later, she came out of the shop with a small bag in her hands, in which were the cute pyjamas. Tonks knew she shouldn't even have bought it. Her mum had given her enough stuff to dress at least ten babies, and with all the clothes she had received at Christmas, she didn't need any more stuff. But she hadn't been able to resist, and besides, her little son would look adorable with this on…

Tonks sighed and walked toward the nearest park. She sat on the ice-covered bench and looked around. She didn't mind the cold anymore, it couldn't touch her. Her mind was set on the past, on Remus. She couldn't help thinking about how things would be different if he had only chosen to care for his children. Would they be happier? Would they be preparing a small room in their apartment for the new member of the family?

Tonks was thinking so hard that she didn't notice her feet and hands were numb with cold. She was completely frozen, her lips were starting to turn blue, and her head was getting dizzy. She looked around with empty eyes, empty mind. And suddenly, blackness hit her.


	8. Seventh Month

Blurry. That's the first word that came to Tonks' mind when she opened her eyes. A big cloud of confusion.

She blinked once or twice and slowly, her vision came back to normal to let her see that she was… in her bedroom. But not her Burrow's bedroom. Her real bedroom. As in the one in her apartment. As in the one she had shared with Remus for three years. But why in the world was she in here?

She sighed and sat on her bed, taking a good look around. Nothing had changed, it was in the same condition as she had left it. Maybe even cleaner. There was no dust, no spider's web. Everything was completely clean. How was that even possible?

Annoyed, confused and intrigued, Tonks pushed the quilt that was covering her away and put her feet out of the bed, intending to go see a little bit more of the apartment, but as soon as her toes touched the floor, she heard a voice coming from the door.

"Nymphadora Tonks, you get back in that bed immediately!"

That voice, which could easily had belonged to Molly after what it had just said, made Tonks freeze on the spot. She knew that voice… well duh, of course she knew that voice! But she hadn't heard it for so long…

Getting back in bed, as she had been told to, Tonks turned to the door and her twinkling eyes met… Remus' tired ones.

"Remus, what…" she started to say.

But she couldn't say more. No noise was coming out of her mouth and she didn't even know what to say. Remus sighed and came closer to her, holding a tray a food which he put on her bedside table before sitting on the bed, next to her. He grabbed the bowl of hot soup which was on the tray and held it in front of her while taking a spoon.

When Tonks understood that he was actually about to feed her, she took an offended air and looked at him, almost insulted.

"I don't really know what happened, but I'm quite sure that I'm still able to eat by myself," she said.

The corners of Remus' mouth twitched a little as he handed her the bowl of soup and watched her eat, concerned. When she was finally done eating all the food that Remus has insisted on giving her, he took the tray and brought the empty dishes back to the kitchen. He came back ten minutes later with a cup of hot chocolate which he gave her, but she simply took a sip and put it aside.

Remus was standing in the middle of the room, a bit uncomfortable, looking at her with hundreds of different emotions on his face. Worry, pain, sadness, love, tenderness, distress and… anger?

This obvious mix of emotions only added to Tonks' confusion. She sat in bed again and wrapped her arms around her belly, which unconsciously made her smile. She used to wrap her arms around her knees like that, but they were now completely out of reach and had been for a while now, thanks for the baby. No wait… thanks to the twins.

Tonks looked up at Remus as she was caressing her stomach. She was under the impression that she had done something wrong. Very wrong. As if something bad had happened and it was her fault. Something that somehow made her unworthy of being a mother. As if she had done something dangerous for her health and the babies'.

The babies… were they okay? A look of alarm passed on Tonks' face as she looked down at her belly.

"Don't worry. They're fine," said Remus softly.

They. Remus had said "they".

"You… you know?" she whispered.

"News goes fast," he said, smiling sadly. "Hermione called Molly who sent me an owl," he added.

Remus refrained himself from saying that he had actually received an Howler and that for ten minutes, Molly's shrieking voice had filled the apartment, telling him about what a bad father and lover he was to leave a poor young woman alone to deal with not one, but two children.

At first, Remus had felt like fainting. So Tonks was having twins… twins! There was no way he could go back to her, he would be putting two lives in danger instead of one. Then he had gone out for a walk. He needed fresh air. That's when he had found her… completely stiff and frozen on a park bench, pressing a small pyjama on her heart. A pyjama with a wolf on it.

He had brought her back to the hospital immediately, where the doctors gave her a potion to make her feel better. They assured Remus that the babies were absolutely fine and told him to bring Tonks back home, since she would be asleep for a day or two because of the potion.

At first, he had considered bringing her back to the Burrow… and then he had decided to take her to their own place instead. The place where they had been happy… the place where he had been a jerk.

And then, after putting her on the bed and covering her with the biggest quilt he had found, he had sat in the living room, fighting against the tears that were coming to his eyes. Tears of fright, tears of pain, tears of anger. It was all his fault, he knew it… if he had supported Tonks during her pregnancy, all of this wouldn't have happened… he had staid away from her to assure the protection of their children, and instead he had been putting her in danger. He should have known it…

Tonks was staring at him, trying to figure what he was thinking about… she sighed, which brought him back to the present. He cleared his throat and sat on the bed again.

"You… maybe you should sleep a little more… you look a little tired," he said.

Tonks laughed.

"I just woke up Remus… and I feel perfectly fine. Now tell me…" she looked at him with scared eyes. "What happened? What…" she sighed. "What did I do?"

Remus could see the fright in her eyes, as much as the worry. She was convinced she had done something wrong, while he was the guilty one… Sighing, he caressed her cheek softly and looked into her eyes.

"I don't know exactly what happened, Dora."

Tonks' heart skipped a beat. Oh, it felt so good to hear him calling her Dora again…

"I… I was out for a walk and I found you… in the park. You were… you had fainted. You were frozen… I brought you to the hospital and they gave you something. You're fine now. The babies are fine. And… Dora, I'm so sorry."

Tears filled his eyes and he kissed her hand before pressing it against his cheek. Tonks heart was about to explode. She kissed the top of his head and hugged him tightly, crying too.

"I've been a fool… I've been a complete total jerk. I'm so absolutely sorry, I…"

He sighed. He didn't know what to say, he couldn't even express how sorry he was. He had abandoned her. It was as simple as that. For about four months, he had left her alone to deal with her pregnancy. And now the only thing that he felt like doing was kissing her until they both were out of breath and energy. But he couldn't… he didn't feel he had the right to, as if those months had made him completely unworthy of being with her.

Tonks sighed and finally let go of him. She looked into his eyes… she had missed him so much! She herself didn't even know how much. She only knew that all that time they were not together, something had gone from her, a part of her had left her.

"Maybe you're right… I should go back to sleep," she sighed.

Remus nodded and got back on his feet, about to leave the room, but Tonks grabbed his hand and looked up to him pleadingly.

"No… don't go… stay with me," she said weakly.

Remus covered Tonks with the quilt and then lay down beside her. He wrapped his arms around her body and she rested her head on his chest, shaking slightly. He kissed her forehead and watched her, his eyes full of love, as she was falling asleep in his arms.


	9. Eighth Month

The next morning, Tonks sent a message to Molly, thanking her for her generosity and help and saying she wouldn't be coming back to the Burrow yet. She promised though to come and spend the last week before the delivery, bringing Remus with her.

During the following week, Tonks and Remus learned to know each other again. They were not officially back together, too much had happened. Remus still had to deal with the fact that he was going to be a father and that there was no escape to it, and Tonks, no matter how hard she loved him and trusted him, was still scared of him changing his mind and going away again, for good this time.

Still, everybody was supporting them and it felt good. Even Molly was coming to see them every singly day, not wanting to hear Tonks' objections.

"I'm not gonna let you exhaust yourself over some housework," she would say when she would protest. "Not when you are as pregnant as you are."

"Molly, pregnant women do their housework all the time! You did yours!" would answer Tonks.

"Well, here's a lucky one who won't."

And so Tonks spent most of her days and nights in bed, since as soon as Molly would leave, Remus would gladly take her place, giving her everything she wanted, and even lots of things she didn't even asked for.

One night, as she was eating a huge bowl of double chocolate ice cream, Remus entered the room and handed her a big envelop.

"Here, this just arrived for you," he said, smiling.

"Really?" she asked, her face lightening up. "Who sent it?"

"How should I know, I haven't read it," he said simply.

Tonks put her ice cream bowl on the bedside table and opened the envelop. Five tiny papers fell from it and she smiled as she read the first one.

"_Dear Tonks,_

_I'm really happy you and Remus are talking again, even if that means you're not staying at the Burrow anymore; it does look empty without you!_

_I wish you will be as happy as you deserve to be Tonks, and I will see you tomorrow at St. Mungos!_

_Love from,_

_Hermione."_

Tonks grinned and put the letter at her feet before taking the next ones.

"_Hello Tonks,_

_Okay, I have to admit that Hermione kind of forced me to write you a letter – says you need some support. I think she's insane cause you seem happier than you've been in months, but oh well… gotta obey the woman! _

_I wish you good luck Tonks, and I'll see ya soon._

_Ron."_

"_Hey Tonks!_

_So you and Remus have… made peace? I'm so happy for you! You two are simply awesome and I never really told you, but you've been a model to me. If I fought so much for Harry and me, it's because I had the best professor. You never gave up on Remus and when I was giving up all hopes, that thought would give me back my strength._

_Anyway Tonks, I wish you luck in your future mother life and I hope to see you soon._

_Ginny xox"_

"_Hi Tonks,_

_Well, I never really got around to congratulating you about the babies. I have to admit I was too busy trying to bring Remus back to his sense, but anyway. I'm very happy for you, and I'm sure Sirius would have been too. His favourite little cousin and his best friend!_

_I hope everything will go well for you Tonks. And by the way… thank you. (I read Ginny's letter… but don't tell her please!)_

_Harry"_

"_**Hey Tonks!**_

_**So you're back with Remus? Poor Fred, he'll be sad to learn that. But I'm happy for you and I wanted to tell you that our shop will always be open for your little ones!**_

_**George.**_

_Hi Tonks._

_I'm just adding this to say that I'm glad about you and Remus, and don't believe anything the other git it saying. _

_Fred._

_**He's so obsessed by you!G.W.**_

_Nevermind him.F.W._

_**Fred and Tonks, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-**_

_Take care TonksFred."_

Tonks laughed and sighed happily. She was glad to have such good friends. They were all so helpful and she knew that without them, things would have been a lot different. Meaning bad different, not good different.

Remus grabbed her empty bowl of ice cream and smiled at her.

"Do you need something else?" he asked softly.

Tonks laughed.

"You and Molly shouldn't spoil me that much or I might get used to it," she said, teasing.

"Really? I thought it was driving you crazy to stay there and do nothing," said Remus, raising an eyebrow.

"You're right," she sighed. "I definitely couldn't… ow!"

She gasped and sat quickly in bed. Remus dropped the ice cream bowl, which shattered on the floor, and sat next to Tonks, worried.

"Are you okay?" he asked, alarmed.

Tonks smiled widely, her eyes shining.

"You wanna feel the baby?" she asked softly.

She took his hand in hers and put it on her belly. Remus held his breath as he felt the baby kicking madly his poor mother from the inside. Somehow, it was a very strange sensation. He couldn't exactly describe it, but it made him feel… great.

Remus looked up at Tonks and examined her. She was looking down at her belly, pressing her hands on it, trying to feel the babies move. And as his eyes were fixed on her, he noticed how much she had changed during the last few months; and not only because of the fact that she had gained weight.

She had always been pretty, especially to Remus' eyes, but looking at her, now and there, he realized that she was amazingly beautiful. Pregnancy sure suited her well. Stars were shining in her twinkling eyes, like usual, but there was a little something else… a little light of pride which made such a difference. Her pale heart-shaped face was literally glowing, giving her cheeks a lovely pink colour. Her body was wider, but it only gave her a healthy look. Even her lips seemed fuller.

As he was staring at her every feature, she looked up at him, their eyes meeting. Without thinking, he got closer to her and gently stroked her cheek with the tip of his fingers. Tonks lifted her hand and started playing with his mousy hair.

Slowly, Remus took her chin between his fingers and pulled her face closer to his, his lips softly brushing against her smooth skin before he finally pressed his mouth against hers.

Shy at first, as if they had only met, as if their love was new, the kiss grew more passionate and while Tonks was wrapping her arms around him, she felt that for the first time in months, she was truly and completely happy.


	10. Ninth Month

Tonks woke up the next morning, still feeling Remus' lips on hers as his arms were wrapped around her body. She slightly turned her head and looked behind her to see that Remus was still sleeping, his hair hiding his closed eyes.

Sighing happily, Tonks carefully freed herself from Remus' embrace and jumped out of the bed. She silently made her way to the bathroom and stopped in front of the mirror to look at her reflection.

She smiled as her eyes fell on her belly. It was so huge that she could barely see her feet. Her whole body seemed to have changed ever so much, but in the same way, she knew that inside, she remained the same old cheerful and clumsy Tonks, and she hoped it would always be that way.

Yes, she definitely was the same… smiling at life, laughing at danger, crying for pain but also for joy. While she was looking in the mirror, her mind brought her back to seven months ago, reminding her that she had, just liked now, looking into the mirror to see a sick and weak woman looking back at her. The difference between the two Tonks – the one she was then and the one she was now – seemed so ridiculous that it made her laugh.

Suddenly, another reflection joined hers as Remus appeared behind her. He pressed his head on her shoulder and wrapped his arms around her, his hands resting on her stomach, before softly kissing her shoulder.

Tonks turned around and hugged him as tightly as she could, pressing her body on his.

"I missed you so much," he whispered in her ear, his voice trembling slightly.

"I missed you too," she said as softly as him.

She backed up a little and took his face between her hands, looking deep down into his eyes.

"Never leave me again, okay? No matter what happens… no matter how much we fight, never leave me," she murmured, he whole body shaking with emotion.

He brought her hand to his lips and kissed them before squeezing them softly.

"I promise… I'll never leave," he said. "I'm so sorry Tonks… I've been such and idiot! I feel as if I'm not worthy of you anymore. I made you suffer so much and I could never apologize enough."

She started playing with a lock of his hair, her eyes glowing with love and happiness.

"I love you Remus," she said, stroking his cheek.

"I love you too Nymphadora… my Dora."

---------------------

Two weeks passed before Tonks started making serious plans for the birth of the babies. She intended on moving back to the Burrow for two short weeks, until the twins were ready to pop out. With Remus this time.

One evening, as she was getting ready to go, she felt a small pain in her stomach. She dropped the shirt she was about to put in her bag and sat on the bed, taking deep breaths.

"It's nothing," she thought to herself. "Just a small cramp."

And so she ignored the pain. She resumed on packing her things and went to take a shower when she was done.

A few hours later, she was sitting in the living room, waiting for Remus to come home, feeling a bit dizzy. She could still feel a slight pain in her stomach, but it was now more frequent, and it was getting stronger by the minute.

When Remus finally got home, she was lying on the couch, breathing heavily while clutching her belly. Alarmed, her ran to her and knelt down beside the couch.

"Dora," he whispered. "Are you alright?"

"Yes…" she gasped. "Don't… don't worry… it's okay."

"Okay?" said Remus, raising an eyebrow. "You can't even talk without gasping for breath every five seconds! How long have you been like that?"

"It… it started hurting… about four hours ago."

"It? What starting hurting Dora?"

She opened her mouth to answer but all that came out was a groan of pain. Tonks quickly sat on the couch, doubling over, tears coming to her eyes.

"Oh my Lord… you're having the babies!" Remus cried.

"No I'm not!" raged Tonks, crying. "It's not the time yet!"

"Dora, you can't keep them inside if they are ready to come out!"

"But I'm not ready," she say in a low voice, her voice trembling with fright as she reached for his hand and looked into his eyes.

Remus grabbed her hand and kissed it softly before looking into her frightful eyes.

"Yes you are Dora! Come on, we're having a baby! Two babies! Isn't that great? Two kids, stubborn like their father and clumsy like their mother!" he said, smiling at her.

Tonks laughed through her tears and looked up at Remus, her whole body shaking.

"And we'll be happy Dora, we will!" he said before kissing her forehead. "So come with me now so that we can the little angels you made."

He helped her to get back on her feet and leaded her to the door, supporting her as she could hardly even walk.

"Hold on tight, I'm going to Apparate us both in front of St. Mungos," he said, getting a bit nervous.

"No!" she gasped. "The doctor… he said… he said it was bad… for the babies."

"Dora, we can't walk all the way there! You can't walk all the way there!"

"Then call a cab!" she shouted furiously.

He helped her back on the couch and ran to the phone, thanking God that Tonks' father was a muggle and that she understood the utility of this machine.

A few minutes later, as he was leading her down the stairs, a muggle cab parked in front of the building. Remus helped Tonks to get inside the bar and gave the address of St. Mungos to the driver, who recognized it as the old fashioned and closed store it looked like for the muggles.

"Are you a mad man?" he asked Remus incredulous. "This woman is about to have a baby!"

"Thank you, I've noticed," answered Remus coldly as Tonks was groaning, whining and searching for her breath.

"Then you should know that what she needs is a hospital!"

"Sir, I gave you an address and I'd be very thankful if you could just drive us there," said Remus as calmly as he could.

"Well I'm sorry but I can't accept…" began the driver.

"Will you just shut up and listen to him!" raged Tonks.

She was looking furious, her face screwing up with the pain that she was feeling and her eyes filled of anger. The driver froze at her sight.

"I'm having a baby, two actually, and yes, I've noticed, but if your life only matters a tiny little bit to you, then I'd advice you to MOVE IT!"

The driver turned to face the road and ten minutes later, they finally arrived at St. Mungos. The driver mumbled as Remus paid him and drove away as quickly as possible. Remus put his arms around Tonks again and tried to help her, but she simply couldn't move anymore. The pain was too strong, too intense, and tears were rolling on her pale cheeks. Remus took her in his arms and brought her to the nearest bench before taking out his wand. A few seconds later, a silvery cloud came out of the tip of his wand and floated all the way to the hospital before entering in.

They waited outside together for about five minutes. Tonks was now screaming of pain every now and then and Remus, his face as white as chalk, was trying to comfort her the best way he could. Then, as Tonks was trying to breathe normally, the door burst open and Hermione came out, followed by three healers, including one who was pushing a wheelchair toward them.

"Tonks, are you alright?" asked Hermione worriedly.

"Why of course, never been better!" she spat at her before shrieking of pain, her eyes closing and her hands squeezing Remus' so tightly that his fingers, and hers, were white.

Hermione ignored the tone and, with the help of a healer, got Tonks in the wheelchair and pushed her inside. A couple of minutes later, they finally got into an empty room and helped Tonks to climb on the bed. The healers pushed Remus out of the room, where he found Molly who, as soon as she saw him, came to him and hugged him.

"Remus!" she cried. "Hermione just sent a message! How is she?"

"She looks terribly in pain and I feel like the most horrible man on earth," he said, looking very pale.

"Aww, don't worry dear," said Molly, patting his hand motherly. "She'll be alright."

"Will she?" he asked, looking worried.

Molly opened her mouth to answer but she was interrupted by a loud and high scream coming from the other side of the door.

"Oh good Lord I'm a monster!" said Remus with a blank expression on his face.

Inside the room, Tonks was probably thinking the same as the healers were hurrying around her. She was looking at them, angry and afraid.

"Could you just stop walking around and do something!" she shouted.

"Miss, calm down," said one healer. "We're gonna help you but first we must be sure that everything is ready."

"Well I know something which is ready. The babies!"

"Don't worry miss, the pain is normal, but it might take a while before they really are ready to come out."

"Are you crazy?! They are ready, and they are ready nooooaargh!!!"

She closed her eyes and bit her lips until she tasted blood in her mouth. The healer sighed and went to the end of the bed.

"Okay then, if you insist, I'm gonna check how far you are."

She lifted up the bed clothes and looked down before her eyes widened and her mouth fell open. She turned to the other healers in the room.

"Get in position, she is ready! I can already see one head!"

Tonks would probably have smiled in triumph or stuck her tongue out at the healer if she hadn't been so much in pain. Instead, she looked at her with a face that clearly said "I told you so."

"Okay miss, you're gonna have to push very hard when I tell you! Push now, push!"

"As if I didn't know that!" raged Tonks. "I'm the one having the baby in case you haven't noticed!"

"Push!"

"I AM PUSHING!"

From the outside of the room, Molly, Remus and Hermione could hear the fight going on inside. It was making Remus feel even guiltier as Molly and Hermione exchanged amused but worried looks.

After about an hour of hearing constant screaming, Remus was about to faint when it suddenly stopped. And then it started again, but It sounded more like crying, and it was way too high to be Tonks' voice.

The door opened and the healers came out, all three of them looking exhausted but relieved. Molly gave Remus a gentle push and he entered the room.

Tonks was lying in bed, her breath now soft and regular. She was covered with sweat and her body was still shaking a bit, but she looked peaceful and happy. She then opened her tired and shining eyes, but she did not look at Remus. Her eyes fell on the cradle beside her in which were sleeping two tiny and rosy babies, their faces so close to one another that their nose were almost touching. One of the babies, which was a tiny bit bigger, had a few amount of hair on its head, which was almost black. The other, however, looked almost bald since its hair was a very light blonde.

Remus' eyes followed her gaze and his heart started beating faster. He went closer to the cradle and, as he looked down to them, he wondered if it was even possible to love that much. And to be afraid that much.

He sat on the bed, next to Tonks, and she looked up at him, her eyes filled with tears. But she was smiling, and her face was glowing. She lifted her weak hands and took his face between them before kissing him softly.

Hermione entered the room and looked at her friends tenderly, smiling.

"Congratulations," she said softly.


	11. Epilogue

Two days later, Tonks was allowed to leave St. Mungos. Remus, who has insisted on staying with her the whole time, was quite thankful to leave behind the hard wooden chair on which he had been sleeping. They had so much stuff to bring back home, since their friends had surprised them by sending baby clothes and food, that they had to call a cab, once again. Thankfully, it was the same driver as the first time.

But it was when they got home that they had their best surprise. Their office room, in which they kept almost nothing apart from a small desk and a bookcase, had been transformed into a beautiful nursery, all pale and fluffy, filled with wonderful gifts.

When Tonks saw it, tears came to her eyes and she looked at Remus, who was holding their small son and looking at him adoringly. Tonks looked down at their daughter, who was in her own arms, and she kissed her softly on the top of her head.

"Welcome home," she whispered.

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_It didn't take us long to name the children or to find godparents. We asked Harry and Ginny, who accepted immediately to be the godparents of our small James Sirius, and Hermione and Ron gladly said yes to our request, making them godparents to our darling Lily Molly._

_As for Arthur and Molly, we told them to consider themselves as our children's grandparents, as they really were parents to me, and of course from that day on, Molly has been mothering me more than ever, saying she is happy to have a second daughter._

_And I'm really happy now… completely happy. I've learned a lot during those nine months of my life. I've learned that life is more important than anything else and that we all must do small sacrifices so that it can go on. And those sacrifices makes us stronger and better. I've also that love can be wonderful, but it can also be the most destructive and dangerous weapon against someone. I've learned to protect my heart, without fully closing it. But the most important thing I have learned is that… you can dream you life. But you must live your dream._

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Tonks sighed happily as she put her pencil down and closed the little notebook in front of her. She turned around and smiled. Lily, her long blonde hair dancing as she was clapping her hands, was shrieking with laughter at the sight of her own twin brother who kept changing his nose, ears and hair, turning them into the most ridiculous shape he could imagine to amuse his sister.

Then, Tonks' heard a noise coming from the entrance of the house and got to her feet quickly, smiling from one ear to another as Remus walked through the door of the living room.

"Daddy!" shrieked Lily happily before she rushed to him and jumped in his arms.

"Hey princess," he said, kissing her on the top of her head as he was ruffling James' hair.

A few seconds after Remus arrived, Molly apparated with Ginny.

"Grandma!" said Lily.

"Aunt Ginny!" added James.

They both rushed to the two women and hugged them very tightly. Ginny winked at Tonks before taking James in her arms.

"So little man, do you want to hang out with me and grandma tonight?" she asked, her eyes shining.

Lily looked up at Ginny and tugged on her shirt.

"Can I come too?" she cried, her little face filled with sadness at the thought of being left behind.

Molly laughed and took the small worried girl in her arms.

"Of course you're coming too darling!" she said, tickling the small girl. "We wouldn't dream of leaving you behind!"

"Will I be allowed to hold the baby this time?" she asked hopefully.

"If auntie Hermione says yes, and if the baby isn't sleeping, then maybe you will," said Ginny, smiling.

"So off we go!" said Molly, smiling at Tonks as if she knew something the others didn't.

"Bye mummy!" shouted the twins in harmony.

Tonks blew kisses at her children, smiling, and then Ginny and Molly disapparated with the children.

Remus, who had witnessed the whole thing without saying a word, sat on the couch and looked at Tonks with a questioning look on his face.

"Why do I have the feeling this was all planned?" he asked.

Tonks sat beside him, a fake innocent look plastered on her face.

"Why, I don't know what you mean," she said cheerfully.

Remus stared at her for a minute and then sighed.

"Alright, never mind. How are you feeling today? Better?"

He looked at her worriedly. She had been feeling sick lately, keeping her from sleeping most of the time and giving her a very tired look. And yet now, she was looking at him, her eyes twinkling and shining.

"Much better Remus. I have to tell you something…"

Remus blinked and backed down a bit, doubtful.

"Did you buy those shoes? Cause I told you already Dora, seven pairs of shoes is more than enough for Lily."

"I didn't buy Lily more shoes," said Tonks, laughing.

"A new dress?"

"No."

"A new toy for James?"

"No, Remus, I…" she said, starting to feel slightly annoyed.

"A dog?" he said, interrupting her.

"What the… Remus!" she said, rolling her eyes as she started to laugh.

She punched his arm and stuck her tongue out at him.

"I can see you don't want to hear what I want to say," she said, getting up.

He grabbed her by the waist and pulled her back down, sitting her on his knees, kissing her as she laughed.

"Come on Dora, yes I want to know."

"Well… I went to the doctor today, for the twins' appointment, and while I was there, I asked to be examined, just to know why I was feeling sick."

Remus looked at her, trying to work out what she had just said, when it suddenly all became clear to him. A light appeared in his eyes and a small smile on his lips.

"And?"

She turned to him, her eyes full of stars.

"I'm pregnant."

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**A/N: Well this is the end. I hope you enjoyed the story, thanks to all those who reviewed, I loved getting comments, and keep it coming! Also, thanks to all those who followed the story til the end, and before anybody ask : Yes, there is a sequel coming! It's already written til the 8th Chapter and I'll be putting it up soon, promise.**

**So once again, thanks everybody!**


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